CASUALTY AT CHRISTMAS
by covblazebabe
Summary: This is a story of a little boy who slept through christmas, he awoke on boxing day when all the presents had been handed out, when farther christmas was long gone from the ward, can the staff of Holby turn back time for a day and make his christmas magical?
1. Chapter 1

_**This is a story of a little boy who slept through christmas, he awoke on boxing day when all the presents had been handed out, when farther christmas was long gone from the ward, can the staff of Holby turn back time for a day and make his christmas magical?**_  
_**Christmas is a time for giving, a time to be with ones family, a time for joy and hope, a time where dreams and wishes can come true.**_  
_**The little boy is terminally ill, he only has one wish, one dream - to get better.**_  
_**The little boy is not the only one who's days are numbered, Nick too has the same fears about his own future, both the boy and Nick are facing a future that's so unsure.**_  
_**This experience will teach Nick and the boy a very valuable lesson...**_

"Mr Jordan please don't leave me" pleaded the boy, the boy was called Jason, 10 years old, he had a brain tumour, he was weak, pale in the face, but still very lively.  
"I promise I won't leave you" promised Mr Jordan with a smile on his face.  
The boy was having surgery for the 5th time in a year.

Nick couldn't understand how the little lad could cope with it all, all kinds of thoughts went through his mind as he helped wheel the boy to the lift and up to surgery.

"I'll win this time Mr Jordan, when they try and put me sleep I'll get to ten" he said.  
Nick laughed, this was a game the pair had played every time the boy needed surgery, normally to evacuate a blood clot on the brain, but this time it was serious, very serious, the boy was about to have part of his tumour removed along with a part of his brain.  
"One, two, three... Four..." Nick counted with the boy he normally only got to seven, but this time, he got to nine.  
Nick smiled proudly as the little lad drifted off to sleep.  
"Sweet dreams mate" he said with a smile "I'll be here when you wake up"

Walking out and back into the lift he placed a hand on his head, he had beaten a brain tumour, well near enough, he had a history, he would have died if it hadn't been for Zoe.  
But this little boy had lived with a tumour for years, he had been fighting since the age of 6.

Nick himself compared to that hadn't really fought at all, he had been diagnosed 4 years ago, operated on 3 years ago, and been giving 5 years leaving him a remaining 2.  
He shook his head, this poor lad had been ill for so long, had to deal with the sickness, the headaches, the legs giving way for so long yet he wasn't afraid, he was happy.

The lift doors opened and Nick walked out, ignoring his staffs 'hello's' and pleads of 'Spencer me to run a Christmas marathon'  
He went back to his office to think.

Sitting down at his Desk he was near to tears, Christmas Eve was soon to come, he had bought the boy a huge water gun for Christmas at this moment he wondered if he would ever have the chance to present him with it.  
He sat with the wrapping paper and the gun before him, part of him wished it was a real gun, if it was maybe he could end it all for himself, he shook the thought away and began to wrap the present.

The last few months hadn't been easy, he was feeling sick all the time, was unable to eat, the little boy was all that kept him going.  
He made things worth it, the boy was an orphan, his parents died when he was just a baby, and his foster family were useless in Nicks eyes, they should be here supporting him but they were nowhere to be seen.

The minutes seemed like hours and the hours seemed like months.  
There was a knock at the door as Nick was pouring himself a third whisky.  
"Come" he called as Adam entered the room.  
"Jason has just come out of surgery" he informed before leaving.

Nick finished his whisky and made his way to the ward, sitting down next to the bed he held back the tears.  
"Hello Jason its all over now" he said with a smile holding the boys hand.

He sat and told the boy stories of the ED, his life, his career and pleaded he would wake up but suddenly the heart monitor started sounding loudly...

_**Thank you for reading people short teaser there, hope you like it!**_  
_**Twitter; covblazebabe**_


	2. Chapter 2

_**Few tech probs uploading this one i dont know why but should work this time! And Sorry its taken a while to update guys! But here is chapter 2**_

_**Chapter 2**_

"Can I get some help in here please" yelled Nick jumping up.  
"Out the way" Cried Adam shoving him to one side, all he could do was stand and watch as the team rallied round the little boy.  
"This can't be happening, please don't let him die" he pleaded looking out the window into the night sky, he spoke to the heavens above and prayed there was a god of some kind there listening to his pleas.

"Blood pressure stabilising" called Zoe as Nick turned back, fear in his eyes.  
He walked over to the bed slowly as the boys heart rate returned to normal.

He sat beside him again and pulled out a small book.  
"Jason, remember when we use to write poems together?" He asked opening the book and turning to the first page "this is one you wrote for me, all by yourself, you didn't give it a name, when you wake up we can think of one together" he continued wiping the tears that were now running down his cheeks, taking a deep breath he read the poem.

"Sometimes we feel fear  
We just don't want to be here  
But we believe in each other  
We will always have one and other  
Look at me now  
Tell me how  
To conquer my fears  
How to conquer my pain  
You took my tears away  
And maybe someday  
I'll do the same for you"

He finishes just in time, bursting into tears he gripped the boys hand "please wake up Jason"

Outside Zoe and Adam stood watching also with tears in their eyes.  
"He treats that boy like his own son" sobbed Zoe letting Adam pull her in for a cuddle.  
"I know Zo" he sobbed hugging her "we've got to stay strong for him, for them both"

"I don't believe it" grunted Dylan interrupting them.  
"What?" asked Adam pulling away from Zoe.  
"Somebody has only gone and left a dead cat outside the ED!" He informed hands on hips.  
Zoe and Adam just stood looking at him, trying to work out if it was some kind of sick joke or not "I'm serious!" He yelled.

The three of them made their way outside, they needed some air anyway, Zoe lit a cigarette while Adam went with Dylan to investigate the cat.  
A few moments later they returned to Zoe who was deep in thought.

"Well looks like a dead cat" said Adam folding his arms.  
Zoe jumped falling from her thoughts "what? What happened to it?" She questioned trying to look interested, of course she wasn't she wanted to go and check Nick was ok.  
"We don't know fluffy isn't talking" laughed Adam, promoting a short giggle from Zoe.

"You two are sick" spat Dylan storming off.  
Zoe and Adam glanced at each other and began laughing "his face" said Adam through laughter.  
"I know! He should take a pill!"

They shared a few moments of jokes and giggles before returning back to the ED, they saw Nick was still sat at the boys bedside, this time he was reading him a book "I'll check on him" reassured Adam urging Zoe to get back to work, since the little boy had been in, the running of the department had been left to Zoe and Adam, and Zoe hadn't been much use of late, she was to busy worrying about Nick to concentrate on the job.

Adam didn't mind this, he liked being in charge and he was sure Nick appreciated it, taking a deep breath he quietly entered the room where Nick and the boy were.

"Any change?" He asked calmly.  
Nick looked up and shook his head but didn't say a word.  
"You should go and get some food, you've not eaten today" suggested Adam.  
"I'm staying here"  
"But Nick.."  
"I'm fucking staying here!" Snapped Nick bolting to his feet squaring up to his colleague.

Adam backed away holding his hands up "ok, ok I was just..."  
"I know what you were just" snapped Nick sitting back down and continuing reading.

Adam left him to it and headed to the canteen, he bought a coffee and a packet of sandwiches, sitting down to eat them Sam came over and plonked herself in the seat opposite him "hi Adam how are you?" She questioned more cheerful than normal.

"Fine" answered Adam with a mouth full of lettuce.  
"Great" Sam mumbled grabbing one of his sandwiches and smiling.  
He grunted "I hear you've got a new man in your life" he questioned trying to make conversation.

"A new man?"  
"Yes that Tom" said Adam giving her a suspect look.  
"Oh him, no, not my type" she answered pausing for a second "too high browed"  
"Well how many should he have?"  
"How many what?"  
"Eyebrows" said Adam smiling "two eyebrows seems, well ok to me"

Sam frowned and tapped him on the cheek laughing "I better get back to work" she said finishing the stolen sandwich.

Adam grunted and watched her rush off, he shook his head and finished eating before returning to the ED, looking in on Nick and little Jason he saw Nick's eyes light up.

"Jason" Nick whispered turning his head in time to see Adam walk in "he's coming round! He's coming round" he said with pure joy turning his head back to the boy "Jason, can you hear me?" He questioned in a pleading tone as the boys eyes opened...

_**Thanks for reading people, hope you like the story so far! Follow me on twitter;**_

_** covblazebabe**_


	3. Chapter 3

_**Welcome back people here comes chapter 3! Hope your all enjoying the story so far!**_

_**Chapter 3**_

To everyone's disappointment the boys eyes closed as quick as they had opened "Jason!" Cried Nick squeezing his hand.  
"He needs rest Nick and so do you, go and get some rest, your not a robot" stated Adam checking the boys notes.

Nick let out a sigh, of course he knew Adam was right, he hadn't slept properly for weeks, his own illness was starting to take its toll "maybe your right" he muttered standing up and making his way to his office.

"Mr Jordan, a word" called Dylan jumping in his way.  
"What is it?"  
"What do I have to do to get things done round here? Lie down and cut an artery?" Snapped Dylan.  
"What are you prattling on about now Doctor Keogh?" Asked Nick yawning.  
"Zoe's nowhere to be seen, Sam's dragged Tom off somewhere and Adam's..."  
"Adam's in resus" interrupted Nick starting to lose his patients, his mind was littered with worry, he didn't need this prat working him up even more.

"Well he should be in..."  
"Doctor Keogh!" Snapped Nick in anger "get out of my way and deal with your own problems! What's the matter with you? Do you need me, Adam, Zoe, Sam or Tom to tell you how to do your job? How many years did you do in medical school? Maybe you should ask Big Mac to wipe your backside for you!"

"Nick that's enough" said Zoe appearing from nowhere and placing a hand on his shoulder.  
"Unbelievable" muttered Dylan hurrying off in the opposite direction.

Zoe took Nick's hand and led him to his office closing the door behind them, she poured him and herself a whisky and sat on the sofa holding out his glass, urging him to sit next to her.  
They made small talk for a while, there was a tense atmosphere between them, they hadn't spoken in great depths for months.

She turned to face him and saw the fear in his eyes.  
"He will be ok you know" she reassessed him.

He didn't answer, he just finished his drink and nodded getting up to pour himself another.  
Zoe felt useless, she could see how afraid he was, she loved the way he had become so close to the little boy, she knew he wanted to be a dad more than anything.

Not so long ago the two of them were trying for a baby, but it all fell on deaf ears, she had made a mistake, the mistake of lying to him about being pregnant.  
No matter how much she tried to explain things to him he wouldn't listen.

Nick stood before her downing whisky after whisky, this killed her inside to see him falling apart like this.  
She knew him better than anyone, she could see through the fake smile, the stern attitude, she knew the real man.

Without thinking she shot to her feet and kissed him passionately.

"Zoe!" He cried pushing her away in shock "what the fuck do you think your doing!"  
"I... I was kissing you" she stammered realising how stupid and desperate she must look.  
"Get out!"  
"Nick please I..."  
"OUT!" He wailed marching her to the door and shoving her out slamming the door in her face.

Zoe stood staring at the closed door and let out an angry sign before screaming the word 'bollox!' At the top of her lungs.  
"Everything alright Zoe?" Questioned Big Mac strolling towards her smiling, looking more cheerful than normal.  
"Yes fine" she answered glancing at the huge cardboard box he was holding "what's in here?" She asked reaching in and pulling out a pack of condoms "cover your stump before you hump" she laughed reading the label aloud.

"There's a few in here" informed Big Mac putting the box on the floor and taking a hand full of packets "don't be a loner, cover your boner. If you go into heat, package your meat. And my personal favourite she won't get sick if you wrap up your dick" he chuckled placing the packets back in the box "there for the christmas party" he continued.

Zoe frowned and giggled "your being a bit ambitious aren't you? There must be over a hundred rubbers in there!"  
"The box full is one of the raffle prizes" he answered with a smile before lifting the box and heading off.

She watched him walk away feeling a little happier, why couldn't Nick take a leaf out of his book, he was always fairly happy, sometimes a bit to happy for Zoe's liking but all the same still a cheerful soul!

She made her way to the little boys room, she figured she would sit with him for a while.

Upon entering the room she could have sworn she saw Tom and Sam jump back from one and other, it was clear to her there was something going on with them two, she should know she knew all the tricks, she could spot the signs a mile off.  
Still she didn't say anything she just took a seat by the bed and run her hand over the boys cheek, his skin felt cold and clammy.

She turned her attention to his bedside table, there were toy cars, action figures, a few cards from the children he had met whilst in hospital and then something caught her eye.  
It was an envelope with the name 'Jason' on the front, she picked it up and proceeded to open it, unfolding the piece of paper that was inside she saw it was a poem, no letter just a poem, she began to read it aloud.

"I knew you were leaving me  
I could see it in your eyes  
I felt all alone  
Watching dark skies  
I sat there holding you  
Tears falling down  
Your pain was over  
You lost your tortured frown  
Before you left you smiled  
As you always did  
Like you always use to  
When we were just kids  
I will always love you  
I'll see you again someday  
My little brother  
Dark skies can't take you away.

Much love from your big brother Michael"

Zoe had tears in her eyes "what!" She muttered to herself "I don't understand"  
"Zoe what are you doing in here?" Came Nick's voice from the doorway.  
"Nick" she stuttered shooting to her feet "look at this! Jason has a brother, and by the looks of it he thinks he's dead"

Nick frowned and took the piece of paper and began reading.  
After a few minutes he glanced up at Zoe and then over at Jason "where did you find this?" He questioned as Zoe pointed to the bedside table.  
"Well it wasn't there before" informed Nick heading to reception "Noel, have you seen this before?"  
Noel looked at the envelope that was being held before him "yes" he nodded "a young lad left it, seemed in a bit of a hurry"

Nick and Zoe exchanged glances "what did he look like? And how long ago was this?" Nick asked Edgar to find out more.  
"When the little boy arrested, the lad scribbled something and asked me to leave it on the boys bedside table, never said who he was or anything, I did ask but..."  
"What did he fucking look like you rectal probe!" Shouted Nick grabbing him and almost pulling him over the desk.

"Nick stop it!" Snapped Zoe making him release his grip.  
Noel straightened himself out before spitting his answer sarcastically at Nick "IC1 male, mid twenties, medium height, medium build, green top, dark trousers"

"Thank you!" Huffed Nick heading to the front entrance in search of his suspect, the little boy had a brother, a brother that clearly saw him arrest and had assumed he had died, Nick had to find him...

_**Hope you all enjoyed that chapter people, please let me know what your thoughts are via comment or review or tweet me on twitter!**_  
_**Thanks for reading people!**_

_** covblazebabe**_


	4. Chapter 4

_**Hello people! Here is chapter 4.**_

_**Chapter 4**_

Nick rushed into the car park, Zoe followed close behind "Nick!" She called "come back in, he's probably long gone by now!"  
he knew she was right, he turned to her and let out a sigh.  
"He might come back" said Zoe trying to give him some hope.  
"Why would he? He thinks his little brothers dead!" Nick snapped barging past her back inside.

"Mr J" called Noel "Mr Ramsbottom is here, I sent him to your office"  
"Who?" Questioned Nick hands on hips.  
"Mr Ramsbottom, you know, plays santa every year"  
"Oh shit! I must have forgot to cancel him" said Nick slapping his forehead and heading to his office where the man in question had decided to make himself at home.

Nick tutted and went in "Mr Ramsbottom" he exclaimed holding his hand out to the gentleman.  
"Mr Jordan" smiled the man shaking his hand "here I am, fully dressed and back again, ready to bring smiles and laughter to the children of the ED"  
"Slight problem there" said Nick "listen I'm really sorry but we won't be needing you this year, I should have let you know but iv been so busy recently I just didn't have the time"

The man looked a little taken aback, he shifted his weight from one foot to the other "you can't give santa the sack!" He exclaimed angrily.  
"Don't tell me! Because he's already got one!" Laughed Nick.  
He didn't seem to amused at Nick's little joke "but I have a calling! A dream! I am santa! The real santa" he yelled as he walked towards Nick.

"Not this year your not, anyway its only a week dressing up in that silly costume, besides you frighten the children! Look at the fuss we had last year" Nick had the guy over a barrel on this one, the previous year a small girl had to be sedated because of this mans scary beard and hugh eyes.

"Fool! Philistine! I'm the real santa! You can't stop me doing my job! I was born to do this job!" He argued.  
"The mad house is that way" said Nick pointing to his office door "now as I said I'm very sorry but we really don't need you this year, see you next christmas maybe" he ushered the man out of his office and closed the door, followed by the blinds which the man was now annoyingly staring through.

He chuckled to himself and sat down behind his desk to gather his thoughts, he took out the poem that the little boys brother had left and read it over and over again, as he read through the words seemed to fill his mind with images, flash backs, slow motion pictures, he remembered parts of his own life.

He was wishing It was possible to turn the clock back and change things, of course he was well aware that what he wanted was impossible.

"Mr Jordan" Cried Charlie bursting in "you've got to come quick!"  
"What? What's happened?"  
"Its santa! He's on the roof!"  
"He's a little early" chuckled Nick standing up.  
"No its Mr Ramsbottom! He's on the roof! He's going to jump" informed Charlie rushing off.

Nick shook his head and grabbed a megaphone from a near by cupboard before following his college outside.

Looking at the roof Charlie was right, there was Mr Ramsbottom standing seemingly calmly right on the edge.  
Nick lifted the megaphone to his lips "Oi Ramsbottom! What do you think your playing at!" He bellowed.  
"I am santa! I must walk the wards of this hospital" was his answer.

"Great!" Muttered Nick as Adam approached "well gone and done it again have we?" He chuckled.  
"Done what?"  
"Upset someone" he answered folding his arms and looking up at santa.  
"Adam, did you want something?"  
"Yes iv come to satnav you out of this dead end you've got yourself into"  
"Doctor Trueman this is not a soap opera!" Snapped Nick giving him a sharp shove out the way, holding the megaphone once again to his lips.  
"Think you will find it is" muttered Adam taking a step back to watch.

"Mr Ramsbottom, come down off the roof and we can talk about this!" He shouted.  
"Um Nick, you've got a megaphone, you know big thing to make voice loud, you don't need to shout through it" interrupted Adam.  
"you speak to me again and I will pour hot coffee over your balls!" Was Nick unwelcoming answer "Doctor Trueman just get back to work will you" he continued looking up at the roof.  
"But I don't want to I want watch...i"  
"I dong care if you don't want to! I just want you to do it! Now hop it!"

Adam shrugged and made his way inside doing a bunny hop as he went.  
Nick watched and shook his head then turned his attention back to the crises in hand.  
"Mr Ramsbottom please just calm down and come down" he called.  
"Your wish is my command!" the man yelled back taking a running jump off the side of the building...

Luckily he landed on something soft - being Jeff's head.  
The two of them ended up in a heap on the ground, it was a miracle they had both very minor injuries.  
Jeff and santa were taken inside with santa screaming "Il gain revenge on the whole pack of you!"

"Not your day is it?" Chuckled Dylan who had been watching from afar.  
Nick shot him a look "if the press get to hear about this I'll know exactly who its come from" warned Nick "I'll perform a living autopsy on you! I'll have your kidneys for a korma!" He continued vain's popping out of his forehead.

Dylan backed away and nodded, for once he didn't mean to offend his boss in anyway at all, sometimes it seemed he couldn't please anyone.

Nick decided he would go and sit with little jason for a while, he was almost there when Noel called him over to reception.  
"Noel this better be important I feel like a clown running across a minefield today!" Sighed Nick leaning on the desk.  
"Its Zoe, I can't find her anywhere, she's left all her patients, Adams going mad, iv called her, iv paged her and iv got nothing back" informed Noel.

"Fucking fantastic" spat Nick running his hand through his hair.  
Suddenly Adam approached and made a grab for the phone, upon dialling a number he glanced at Nick "Some help you are" he spat.  
"Remember who your talking to Doctor Trueman!"  
"Where's the amazing Zoe? She's left me to deal with her patients one of which has just gone into pulmonary oedema, I do have my own patients to deal with you know! Iv only got one pair of hands!"

"Alright Adam you've made your point" answered Nick, today things seemed to be going from bad to worse.  
Adam slammed the phone down in anger "I'm working harder than a fat blokes arteries here" he wailed.  
"Adam I'll find Zoe"  
"What's the point? These last few weeks she's been like a disabled person at a football match, close to the acton but hardly likely to score a goal!"

"ENOUGH!" yelled Nick "get back to work I won't have you talking about a college like that!"  
Adam grunted and made some sly comment under his breath unheard by Nick.

"Mr Jordan" said Noel "someone on the phone, says his names Michael he wants to know about little Jason"...

_**Thanks for reading people, hope you like the story so far, as always let me know what you think if you can! Follow me on twitter.**_  
_** covblazebabe**_


	5. Chapter 5

_**Hello people! Really sorry for not updating sooner! But don't worry have caught up now! Merry christmas to you all! Here is chapter 5!**_

_**Chapter 5**_

Nick snatched the phone and held it to his ear "hello?... Hello?... Is that Michael? ...hello? Is there anyone there?... Speak!"  
"Problem Mr J?" questioned Noel.  
"They hung up" answered Nick frustrated handing the phone back and leaning on the desk placing his head in his hands "where the hell is Zoe!" He muttered.  
Right now he needed her, he just wanted a cuddle, he felt his whole world was falling apart.

"Nick" said Adam coming up behind him "listen I just wanted to apologise I shouldn't have .."  
"Its fine" said Nick spinning round to face him, tears had formed in his dark brown eyes, making them look glazed over.  
Adam smiled and held his arm out "come on Nick, let's get you to your office" he said putting his arm round his friend.

They had been through a lot together, been there for one and other when times were tough.  
He led Nick to his office and made them both a coffee.  
Sitting down facing each other Adam began to speak "Nick I know we haven't always seen to eye to eye, I mean your 6 foot 1 and I'm only ..."  
"I know how tall you are" chuckled Nick sipping his coffee "having you around is like working with one of the seven dwarfs"

They both laughed, when they didn't have work to worry about they got on like a house on fire.  
"I think little Jason's brother called reception" said Nick taking out the poem that was left on the boys bedside table.  
He read it aloud and looked at Adam who was now smiling.  
"Quite the poet eh" he sighed after taking a sip of coffee.

Nick nodded and put the piece of paper away "how are you anyway Adam?" He asked "we've not had a proper chat in a while"

Adam sat back in his seat and shrugged his shoulders, his life wasn't going very well at the moment.  
"I'm ok" he muttered sipping more coffee.  
Nick could see he clearly wasn't ok, but he wasn't going to challenge him, he had his own worries and problems, besides Adam knew where he was should he wish to talk.

"I think my times running out you know" he told Adam looking down.  
"Don't say that" was the reply.  
"I mean it" Nick answered holding his hand out "the shakes are back, I feel sick all the time, I can't eat, I can't sleep"

Adam leaned forward and stared at him for a few moments before speaking "Nick, we've been here before, you feel sick because you haven't eaten" stated Adam.  
Nick shook his head "No Adam, its not that, some days I feel like life couldn't get any better, even when things are falling apart around me, I still feel happy when I shouldn't, that's my brain trying to trick me"

Adam sat back listening intently with his arms crossed.

"It means I'm dying, its getting closer and closer everyday" he paused to take a breath "I feel..."  
"Nick, come on we live to die, that's the point of life, we are all put on this earth to die, its everyone's destiny" snapped Adam starting to feel a little unnerved by the conversation. "You have to just get on with things Nick" he continued finishing his coffee and standing up.

"Adam" said Nick also standing up, a strange look in his eyes "I want to thank you"  
Adam took a step back, he didn't like the way Nick was acting, it was strange, frightening even.  
"You don't need to thank me for anything" he said with a smile and a freaked out look on his face.  
"No, I do, when iv needed someone, to talk to, to turn to, to be there and listen, you've always been there"

Adam shook his head and looked at his watch "its um fine, really um you can blow me after work" he tried to laugh at his own joke but it didn't work, Nick was frightening him "I better get back to work, maybe you should to" he continued before exiting the office.

Nick sat back down and smiled to himself, he couldn't understand what was happening to him at the moment, he began looking through a draw full of photo's, he often did this when he felt this way.  
Suddenly there was a knock at the door, it was Linda, she entered after Nick's polite 'come' call.  
"Mr Jordan, I thought you would like to know little Jason opened his eyes again" she informed with a smile before continuing "but he faded out again, its a good sign though"

Nick smiled at her and nodded, she walked over to join him behind his desk "wow you look young here" she pointed out picking up a photo.  
he laughed and again nodded.  
"Are you alright?" She questioned concerned.  
"I'm fine, just wanted to have a look through these" he answered smiling at her.

She smiled back and left the office, Nick hit play on the sound system in his office and got out his poetry book, he wanted to write a poem for little Jason maybe it would make him wake up properly.

He sat staring at the paper in front of him, he wrote a few lines then crossed them out.  
He wanted something good, something pure, something from the heart.  
He began thinking deeply and wrote...

BRINGGG, BRINGGG belted the phone waking Nick with a startle as he scrambled for the receiver "Nick Jordan" he slurred rubbing his eyes, the phone went dead.  
He pulled a face and hit re-dial 'the last number that called your line was with-held' came the automated voice at the other end.

"Shit" he muttered looking down the blank piece of paper in front of him and rubbing his head "I must have fallen asleep"  
He looked at the clock, it was 9 in the morning.  
"I must have been tired" he chucked sitting back in his chair.

It was now christmas eve...

_**Thanks for reading people again sorry for the late update, hope your enjoying so far, please comment or review or even follow me on twitter.**_  
_** covblazebabe**_


	6. Chapter 6

_**Hey guys welcome back! Again sorry for late chapter updates! Please comment or review if you can, hope you enjoy this chapter!**_

_**Chapter 6**_

Nick made himself look as presentable as he could, he wanted to tell little Jason it was christmas eve, perhaps the excitement would wake him.

Making his way through reception he spotted Zoe almost at the same time as she did him, she turned away quickly in an attempt to avoid him, but this was Nick Jordan nobody could hide from him.

"Doctor Hannah" he called speeding up and finding her crouched behind pile of boxes of left over decorations "hiding are we?" He questioned.  
"Me? Oh no" she grinned "just dropped my earring"  
Nick folded his arms and narrowed his eyes at her not amused at all.  
"Perhaps you would like to tell me where you disappeared to yesterday?"  
She knew he was going to ask and toyed with the idea of lying but it never seemed to work with this man.

Taking a breath she answered "last minute shopping"  
Nick sighed "Zoe for once in your life why can't you stop trying to look like a fucking footballers wife!" He snapped before glancing down at Zoe's glowing new high heels and walking off into little Jason's room where Adam was changing drips.

"Anything yet?" Nick asked a pleading look upon his face.  
"Nothing Nick, sorry, but he's stable, you must understand his brain needs to heal"  
"You think I don't know that!" He yelled frustrated.  
"Hey you should chill out, we are all doing our best here and you coming in here making..."  
"Just leave Adam" said Nick cutting him off.

Adam shook his head and walked out unsure what he'd done wrong, he too was upset about the little boy, he wasn't as close to him as Nick was but even so, there were times when he'd sat with him, played games, taught him card tricks and told him stories.

Back in the room Nick sat holding the boys hand telling him stories about the ED, and his life, there were so many to choose from like the time he gladly told Doctor Hannah she had nits, the look on her face was a picture.

There was another time when he'd found drunken messages from Zoe on his home answer machine.

Also his first day as clinical lead in the department, he walked into resus to find Zoe and Adam arguing over a patient, he then threw a ball at them to stop them and give a little sarcastic introduction speech.

He stopped himself, all the times that had made him laugh or happy had been in some way connected to Zoe.  
He shrugged it off and continued...

Elsewhere Zoe had retired to the staff room, she hated it when Nick spoke to her the way he just had, in her eyes it was unprofessional and rude, she wiped a tear away from her eye as Adam walked in.

"Everything ok Zo?" He asked standing in the door way clutching a pile of patients notes.  
She looked up and nodded, she didn't have the strength to talk and fight the crying fit that she felt so sure was coming on, talking would only would only make the tears come faster.

He came and sat beside her dropping the notes on the knee high coffee table in front of them.  
He placed his arm round her which forced her into floods off tears, she let herself be comforted by him for a few minutes before she was able to speak.  
"I can't do nothing right" she sobbed still holding onto her colleague for dear life.

He held her tight whispering "shush, its ok Zoe, its ok"  
She had always liked Adam for his kind caring nature, he always knew the right thing to say, he was everything she ever wanted in a man, well almost everything, there was one thing missing.

The fact that he wasn't Nick.  
As much as Nick treated her horribly at times, there was still a special place in her heart for him, and nothing - no man, woman or beast would ever change that.

"I'll make us a nice cup of tea shall i" Adam said with a smile pulling from their embrace.  
She watched him make them a drink each and smiled "thank you Adam" she muttered, a warm heartfelt tone in her voice.

Elsewhere Noel and Lenny were getting excited about their trip round the wards tomorrow, Noel this year was playing santa and Lenny very kindly offered to be his elf.  
They were busy pouncing about in their costumes singing along to christmas songs that were belting through the radio speakers.

"Will you two save the song and dance until tomorrow please" wailed Nick steaming towards them like an express train.  
"Sorry Mr J" muttered Noel taking his hat off and settling back down behind reception desk.  
"Bit of a scrooge this weather" spat Lenny "you might have that S.A.D"

Nick's eyes almost fell from their sockets "what did you just say?" he hissed placing his hands on his hips.  
"Well your just grumpy all the time, I know some very good remedies for ..."  
"One more word Doctor Lyons and you can kiss your job goodbye" snapped Nick barging past him and heading towards his office, slamming the door behind him.

He poured a whisky and sat down putting his head in his hands, his head was throbbing, he opened his desk draw and took out some painkillers along with his many other bottles of pills.  
He took them one by one and settled down, grabbing a pen he began writing...

Its thousands of years  
Since that cold starry night  
When the world was still young  
So clear so bright  
By the power of love  
It was blinding the light  
Now millions of people believe  
it is the magic of christmas eve

When the rising sun  
Shows the way  
To a brand new day  
Be a part of this world, be together  
Send the light to shine  
And light up the shadows of the night  
Try to catch them if they fall

Its christmas all over the world tonight  
Your voice will be heard  
In the darkest night  
Reach out to the future  
Reach out to the light  
Cos millions of people believe  
And live in the spirit of christmas eve...

He sat back and held the paper before him, with a smile he whispered "its ready"  
Excitedly he rushed to little Jason's room and hurriedly ushered everybody out of the room so that he could share his masterpiece with his poetry pal.

After reading it aloud a few times he whispered "Merry Christmas Jason, please wake up soon, its christmas day tomorrow"  
He took the boys hand and slowly drifted off to sleep...

_**Cheers for reading people!**_  
_**Twitter covblazebabe**_


	7. Chapter 7

_**Thanks for coming back people as always hope your enjoying so far, please comment or review if you can.**_

_**Chapter 7**_

Nick woke with a startle, he could hear singing coming from the ED reception, he wiped his eyes and grunted "morning little man" he whispered to a still unconscious Jason, he sighed and stood up whilst stretching.

"Ohh" he winced grabbing his back, he was stiff from sleeping on the hard chair next to the little boys bed all night.

But he didn't mind, he would be ok after a bacon sandwich and an expressio coffee, after straightening his clothes and yawning a few times he made his way out to reception where his team were all dressed in santa hates and had tinsel round their necks.  
Except for Noel and Lenny who were santa and his elf.

He couldn't help but smile "Merry Christmas Mr J" smiled Noel handing him a santa hat.  
He grinned and placed it on his head, clapping his hands he got ready to make a speech, when the room was quiet he began talking...

"Members of Holby city ED to start with I'd like to wish you all a very Merry Christmas, I'd also like to say some of you may have noticed iv not been at my best recently and for that I can only apologise. Iv been allowing things to get to me to much, which I'm sure you will agree is very unprofessional of me. But I hope you can all forgive me"

The staff cheered and clapped before letting him continue.

"Thank you, now I don't want to keep you, Noel has to empty his sack and Lenny I hope you've leant your Elf and safety"

This of course got a few laughs.

"I'd like to say I admire santa, he has the right idea only visiting people once a year" he chuckled as the staff did so with him.  
"Right back to work" he demanded with a clap of his hands, his voice had returned back to its stern usual tone.

He caught Zoe smiling at him, smiling back he remembered that there had been times in the last few days when he had so wanted to hug her, to feel her in his warm arms, he also remember that he hadn't been very nice to her on some occasions.

"Hey" she said walking over a cautious smile on her face.  
"Hello Zoe" he replied.  
"This is for you" she said handing him a bag.  
"Oh um Zoe I'm sorry I haven't got you..."  
"Its ok" she said grinning happy that he'd accepted her gift  
"Maybe I could buy you breakfast?" He questioned  
She smiled in approval and they made their way to the canteen.

The place was almost empty, there was just a few gloomy looking women sat in one corner, a teenage boy with crutches in another and finally a strange eerie looking old lady dressed in rags doing a jigsaw puzzle.

They got their food and sat down, an awkward silence came over them it was Zoe who spoke first "open your present, it took ages to pick it" she said almost sounding like a lovestruck teenage girl.

He smiled and took the present out the bag and unwrapped it "Wow Zoe, thank you" he said surprised, it was a rolex watch not a cheap one either "you shouldn't have spent this much on me" he continued.

For a minute she thought he was going to say he couldn't or wouldn't accept it, but to her relief he didn't say anything, he just took it out of the box and put it on.

"Looks good" she chuckles "you look sexy wearing a watch"  
He gave her a strange look, she knew she now sounded like a teenager.  
Throughout their breakfast after that neither of them spoke a word, maybe through embarrassment.

Zoe's pager suddenly sounded, she grabbed it quickly and went to knock it off.  
"Zoe..." Said Nick raising one eyebrow "now we don't do that do we?"  
She looked at him confused.  
"Get back to work" he said with a wink licking some brown sauce of his tender lips.  
She kissed his cheek and hurried off.

He made a Mmm noise, not at the kiss but at the bacon that was left on her plate "I'll have a bit of that" he muttered pushing his plate out the way and tucking into her left overs.

Back in the department Zoe had just reached reception where Adam was waiting "what we got?" Asked Zoe confused.  
"Um nothing, I had to page you because, um well, because"  
"Spit it out man" yelled Zoe losing her patients, her volume had attracted attention and people were now glaring in her direction.

"Staff room Zoe" whispered Adam under his breath.

Still confused Zoe followed, as they entered the room she saw there was a young, dark haired lad sat having a hot drink on the sofa "excuse me, this is a staff room not a ..."  
"Zoe" spat Adam pulling her back "this is Michael"  
"I don't care if he's king fucking kong he shouldn't be in here"  
"Little Jason's brother" said Adam as calmly as he could with narrowed eyes...

_**Thanks for reading people! **_  
_**Twitter covblazebabe**_


	8. Chapter 8

**Welcome back people.**

**Chapter 8**

Zoe took a step back and gave Adam a look of surprise.  
"He wants to see him" informed Adam "I thought it best to explain the situation to him first"  
She looked at him and then at Michael, she was in deep thought, why had he come back now? Where had he been through the boys illness? Certainly not here!

"I don't think its a good idea" she whispered.  
"He's his only known family Zoe, he has more right than anyone" was Adams answer.  
Of course she knew this to be true, but she felt that Nick and even her had more rights than him, in fact any of the ED staff had more rights.

Adam could sense what she was thinking and pulled her outside "Zo I know what your thinking but you know the law"  
"He could be anyone" snapped Zoe.  
"He could be, but he's not, iv done all the checks" said Adam handing her some papers "he ran away from care 10 years ago, been untraceable, he changed his name and.."  
"Alright! I get it!" She shrieked starting to feel very angry now "what's Nick going to say when he finds out? He'll have kittens!"

"Zoe, Adam what was the emergency?" Bellowed Nick's voice from the other side of reception.  
The two of them froze on the spot.  
"Emergency Mr Jordan?" Questioned Adam.  
Nick shot him a sharp look "Adam as much as your suppose to you never call me that"  
"Um well its christmas and at christmas we um do things um don't we" he struggled for words before pushing his hands deep into his pockets.

At this point Nick was stood right in front of them "Zoe's pager went off" he said folding his arms glancing between them.  
"Yes it did" stuttered Zoe.  
"So what was the emergency?"  
Zoe and Adam exchanged glances.  
"What's going on here?" Questioned Nick as he reached for the staffroom door.

"NO!" Yelled Adam and Zoe jumping in the way "you can't go in there Noel is getting changed" lied Adam thinking on his feet.  
"Why is he changing? He's suppose to be up on Keller ward delivering gifts"

This time it was Zoe's turn to think fast "well there was um this dementia patient in cubicle two and she thought he was the real santa and..."  
Nick sharply interrupted "cubicle two you say?"  
"That's right" said Zoe nodding.

"Mr J" came Noel voice from afar.  
Nick shook his head at his colleagues "well I think Harry Houdini would be proud of that don't you? Or maybe even Paul Daniels?" He turned to face Noel who of course was still dressed as santa, Lenny the elf trotted cheerfully behind.  
"Well done, you managed to escape from the staff room without anyone seeing you"

Noel pulled a face and brushed the comment off not having a clue what he meant "um my sacks empty, Keller and Darwin wards are done, lots of happy children, I just came to ask you for the keys to the stock cupboard so I can get a refill"

Nick smiled and handed him the keys before turning his attention back to Adam and Zoe who were now stood looking like a pair of children who had been caught with their hands in the cookie jar.

"Right I want to know what or who is in there and I want to know right now" said Nick sternly.

Silence.

Nick shook his head and crossed his arms "you know one of the most valid principles of my life and I may have said this before, is honesty" he stated, this of course made Adam and Zoe burst into laughter, this gave Nick enough time to barge his way into the staff room where he was confronted by Michael who was just about to leave.

"Do I know you?" Asked Nick curiously.  
"Um no I don't think so, listen I better go this was a bad idea" said the mysterious man.

"Its Jason's brother" informed Adam.  
Nick narrowed his eyes "oh so your the coward that left the poem?" He questioned.  
"Well yes I am and now I'm leaving"  
"Your going nowhere" snapped Nick grabbing him by the collar and forcing himself against a near by locker "your going to stay and face the music, have you any idea what that little boy has gone through! And where were you! I'll tell you shall I! Nowhere! Absolutely fucking nowhere"

"Easy Nick" said Adam calmly stepping in "come on he's here now, he's got a right to see to see his brother"

Nick grunted and walked off, he knew if he didn't he would do something stupid, he went and sat with the boy, at this point he was hoping against hope that he would wake up.

He was even thinking maybe this was all a dream and he was the one asleep soon to wake up and find none of this had ever happened, and everything would be ok.  
But he knew deep down these thoughts were in vain.

He sat beside little Jason's bed and looked at him, he wasted no time in talking, he really needed him to wake up now, he needed a miracle.

I haven't prayed since I was young  
But right now I need a miracle  
No matter what happens now  
I'll always be there for you  
Your my miracle Jason

His words were spoken softly, with love, with pain, with tears.

The song you hear  
Is me being here  
For now and always  
In your hour of desperation  
No your not the only one  
I need a miracle now

The sunlight of the morning lit the room and little Jason opened his eyes, Nick gripped his hand tighty as he watched the boys eyes close again.

He stood up and headed for the door.

"MR NICK!" ... Came a little voice...

**Hope you liked that guys!**


	9. Chapter 9

_**Hey guys here's the FINAL chapter for this one!**_  
_**Chapter 9 (FINAL)**_

Nick turned slowly with a smile, all his dreams were starting to come true, little Jason was awake, but was he brain damaged?  
Would he need more treatment?  
What was going to come now?  
"Jason?" He said with a smile sitting down at the bedside.

"Christmas?" The little boy stuttered, he was struggling to talk, he was trying to move, but watching him Nick could see his movement was limited, maybe he needed more time to wake up properly.

"Christmas has past" he said softly.  
The boys expression changed "I wanted to be awake for christmas" he exclaimed.

Nick smiled as an idea sprang into his head.  
"Its christmas" he said with a sly grin and pulling himself up, he led the staff, his team, his trusty team out of the room.  
"Let's recreate christmas for him" he whispered flashing Jason a smile through the open doors. "Noel, Lenny get your outfits back on, let's make it special for Jason"

Everyone smiled.  
Noel and Lenny rushed off to get changed, Adam and Zoe went to find some twigs to throw tinsel round, Nick started to wonder what they were going to do with a few twigs, but Adam and Zoe were a couple of jokers at times so he was far from worried.

He went back to his office and grabbed the water gun he had bought little Jason and returned to the boys bedside.

Little Jason was now sat up and tucking into some fish and chips, Nick smiled and stole a few chips, strangely his appetite was seemingly coming back, if only he could have a bacon sandwich right now!

He handed the little boy his gift, the boy smiled and excitedly started un wrapping it.

"Oh wicked" he exclaimed "can I try it out now?" He asked.

Nick smiled and nodded taking the water gun and walking over to the sink, filling the gun.  
Right now he was overwhelmed with happiness.

He walked back over to the bed and handed the water filled gun to the boy.

"AHhH" he screamed as boy soaked him with water, Charlie walked in with a tray of more food for the boy.  
Nick took one look and said "more fucking turkey!"

The boy laughed and began eating, he needed to eat as much as he could to get his energy up.

Nick and Jason had been through a lot together, he knew now the boy would be ok.

This experience had taught him a lot he knew now that family and friends are the most important things in life, he wished he saw his own mother more, he wished he had told her about his illness.

But he couldn't, he had tried in the past but it was impossible to tell her.

Zoe walked over and placed a loving hand on his shoulder, he looked up and smiled she was all he really wanted.  
But he was afraid of being hurt, but right now he didn't care, little Jason had made it, he was awake and happy - he took a risk so why couldn't he?

He stood up and kissed Zoe passionately and whispered 'I love you'...

_**Hope you enjoyed that people! Let me know what you think!**_  
_**Twitter;**_  
_** covblazebabe**_


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